Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
