Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
