i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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