When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize