Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
