lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize