don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize
