There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Are we still banned from the library?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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