I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
