Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
