She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
