Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
