Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
