Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
