i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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