Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize