Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize