Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
