I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
