Moan for me like Helen Keller
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
