its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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