sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
What a dumb baby whore.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Randomize
