So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
