I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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