i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
