ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
