filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Just invented taco cereal.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize