i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
We have so much sex to catch up on
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
