I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
