I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize