Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
A+ Viking dick
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
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