his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
