I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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