where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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