spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Randomize
