I wish I could punch you in the face.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize