How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize