I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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