I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
