yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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