drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
try to milk me bitch
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
