By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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