The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
