I didn't shave. On purpose
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
i've created a new STD.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize