just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize