great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize