it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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