yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
