She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
