You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize