She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
