Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
